While the majority of the application looks good, we'd like to ask for a revised third person sample and an expanded personality section.

The reason for this is that the linked sample is written in first person/action spam format. You are welcome to link to another thread or log, or write a new sample. We would like to see an expansion based on a more in depth look at her relationship with Joel and how it has had an impact on her.

We apologize for the inconvenience, and you have one week to reply to these revisions. Thank you.